Many might say I have a sick sense of humor. The truth is, Loren and I shared the same sense of humor. Should I have passed first you can bet Loren would’ve came up with the 20 reasons about me. Ha. Fact.
At 3 years and 7 months out, I’m learning to look at life through new lenses.
Ah, the things I did for love and the things I did begrudgingly, as his help meet.
THUS, MY 20 REASONS WHY TO NEVER RE-MARRY!
1) Never again must I need to wipe small splats of urine off the toilet rim.
2) Never again must I need to bake chocolate chip cookies weekly.
3) Never again must I need to be sure his Winco work shirts are perfectly clean.
4) Never again must I need to perfectly match his socks.
5) Never again must I make an emergency trip to the pharmacy to pick up his RX (that he was supposed to pick up the day before).
6) Never again must I pick up toenail clippings that accidently missed the garbage can.
7) Never again must I pick up a wadded piece of paper that didn’t hit the target.
8) Never again must I sweep sawdust falling from the blue jeans and suspenders he had been wearing when outside cutting firewood.
9) Never again must I help a man who had side line businesses that include the wife helping him 5 – 10 hours each weekend.
10) Never again must I tell him to get off Facebook during a “too-long” sermon at church.
11) Never again must I ask him to stop playing his solitaire game when I wanted good conversation (while I was driving the Challenger on a Friday date night).
12) Never again must I need to ask him what he’s thinking if he’s unusually quiet.
13) Never again must I massage his back and shoulders until my arms and hands ache.
14) Never again ………… wait a minute. STOP! I QUIT!
The truth is this fun little blog has suddenly become very sad. Hot tears are now flowing. I’d give anything to have our life back.
Want some wise advice?
- Hang on tight to your loved one tonight.
- Kiss him hard (no light pecks here and there).
- Hug him tightly (none of those light pats on the back).
- With your spouse, make love fervently.
- Get caught up in the moment like it’s your last time (no half-hearted stuff here).
And, please don’t think I was his slave OR married to a lazy man. On the contrary! He worked 60 – 70 hours a week for Winco and then busted his tail for pleasure along with the projects we enjoyed. As he slowed down towards his upcoming retirement, Loren did multiple little things for me. We were having the time of our lives, lovin’ and playing hard those final 7 years. No regrets!
P.S. Yes, it’s true that I’m learning how to enjoy life in the present but I’d readily re-marry Loren again.
This is so good Julia. The last few years I have began thanking Jesus for little annoying things about VELDON. Jesus thank you that I get to clean up his toast crumbs. Thank you that I get to straiten his towels. Thank you Jesus that I can close the closet door one more time. Oh rats! I have to reroll the toothpaste tube! No! Thank you Jesus that I get to reroll the toothpaste tube again. I think these things I became more aware of after Loren passed. And also because nearly all the ladies in my Senior Ladies Bible Study at church have lost their husbands. So thanks Julia for your blog posts. I hope they help us all be aware of what we have and be grateful and where we would be without our guys. Blessings. Aunt Dorothy
Aunt Dorothy, I’m happy this blog somehow confirmed what you’ve already realized. Once the husband is gone a person never has him back. Quirks and the delicious moments alike. Many blessings to you also, aunt Dorothy. Love, Julia
Julia, I started reading this to Gary and he stood smiling, because we both could relate too much of what you wrote and I was reading. Then yo wrote, I (you) stop….then you said tears were coming and my tears were coming as well. Gary and I will celebrate our 54th Anniversary February 12…plus we dated a year. My heart hurts for you. Hugs and Love, Kjn. ❤❤ PS, I enjoy reading your Blog
O thank you Karen! O the crazy things that irritate us but symbolize our lives with our loved one. And you two are sooo blessed to have your 54th anniversary fast approaching! I love you two so much! Julia
Oh Julia, I think this one is your best and my favorite blog you have written yet. Thank you. My Jim and your Loren had a lot in commen. ❤️
O thank you Connie! I was literally embarrassed when my bluehost site published this (I had forgotten I had written it). I wondered if it was condescending of Loren and made me seem ridiculous. I’m happy your Jim and my Loren had so much in common! Julia